Rebecca's Ponderings

August 14, 2010

Note to self for when I am old…

Filed under: Life — Rebecca @ 7:06 pm
Tags: ,

Because I grew up surrounded by retirees…

Because I now help out my elderly neighbor on occasion…

Because I want to emulate some of what I have observed…

Because I want to be sure I do NOT emulate some of what I have observed…

And, because I know that memory loss often accompanies age…

NOTE TO REBECCA FOR WHEN YOU ARE OLD:

1. Do NOT greet people at the door wearing a housecoat, mumu, or curlers. In fact…

2. Be sure to get dressed and fix your hair EVERY day. You never know when someone might call to invite you to go somewhere and you will miss out if it takes you three hours to get ready. You do not have to be dressed to the nines, just be presentable.

3. When people tell you the television is too loud, it is time to get your hearing checked and get a hearing aid. Then…

4. ALWAYS check the batteries in your hearing aid before you go to church.

5. Make an effort to keep in touch with family and friends. Relationships are not one-sided. And while we are on that subject…

6. Learn to use modern technology to keep in touch with your grandchildren. You do not have to use it all of the time, however they will appreciate your effort and the relationship will be stronger for it.

7. When you do call or communicate with friends and family, do NOT discuss your bodily functions or health issues. That is between you and your health professional. Also…

8. The observance of Communion at church is NOT the time to discuss regularity (your own or anyone else’s).

9. Telling people how much better things were wherever and whenever you used to live, does not make them want to go there. It only makes them wish that YOU would go back there. And, just in case you do not remember…

10. You grew up in Florida. Florida is flat. It did snow once, but you were not old enough to go to school at the time. You always had shoes, and your bus stop was in your front yard.

11. Make every effort to greet each day and each person with a smile and a grateful heart. Be kind, courteous, and generous. With that in mind…

12. Do NOT run over people with the buggy at the grocery store. It is not a weapon.

13. A dog is a great companion and walking him will help keep you young and healthy. However…

14. You may only own one pet. You do not want to be known as “The Cat Lady.”

15. Put a full-length mirror near the door and always check it before you leave the house. Also…

16. Be sure to check for stray toilet paper before leaving the restroom.

17. Go new places, meet new people, and learn new things; it keeps you young and gives you something interesting to talk about. And in order to do that, you’ll need to…

18. Do some form of exercise every day. Remember: if you don’t use it, you lose it.

19. Carry a small purse and empty it out regularly. Keep your money in your wallet, and…

20. DO NOT, under any circumstances, carry money in your BRA!

21. Remember that traditions are for people, and people are the more important part of that equation. Also…

22. Traditions are only meaningful to the people who want to keep them. The moment they become obligatory or forced, they lose all significance.

23. Do not move into a retirement village, attend only ‘senior’ events, or otherwise shut yourself off from young families, because…

24. You are called to disciple younger women in godly living. It is impossible to do that if you are always segregated by age.

25. Remember that God has a purpose for your life. In fact…

26. The simple fact that you are still on earth is proof that He still has ministry left to accomplish through you.

27. Be sure to update your clothing, makeup, and hairstyle regularly. Oh, and remember…

28. Pastel blue, lavender, and pink are great colors for cotton candy, but are ridiculous colors for your hair.

29. And finally, remember that “old” is a relative term. Your kids thought you qualified as old when you were 30. So…

30. Put these things into practice now. That way, you won’t have to learn them when YOU finally admit that you are qualified to be considered “old.”

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2 Comments »

  1. I don’t know about #28, Becky! I plan on going back to pink when I’m “old.” 🙂

    Comment by Megan Schlobohm — November 17, 2010 @ 4:35 pm | Reply


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